Alternative Therapies

[Nancy]

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to
take any word from the dictionary,alter it by adding, subtracting,
or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.



Here are this year's {2005} winners:




1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund,
which lasts until you realize it was your money to
start with.




2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.




3 Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid
people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The
bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of
breaking down in the near future.




4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for
the purpose of getting laid.




5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which
renders the subject financially impotent for an
indefinite period.




6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.




7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic
wit and the person who doesn't get it




8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you
are running late.




9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.




10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got
extra credit.)




11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending
off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like,
the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.




12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting
through the day consuming only things that are good
for you.




13. Glibido: All talk and no action.



14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to
seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.




15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance
performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.




16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito,
that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning
and cannot be cast out.





17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding
half a worm in the fruit you're eating.



And the pick of the literature:



18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole!

[Tracer]

LMAO!!! I especially like
18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole!

[Lil'Emu]

LMAO too...Some good ones here Nancy. Great post!