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Elfin
Joined: 23 Apr 2004 Posts: 31 Location: No. Calif.
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Posted: Mon Jun 28, 2004 1:23 pm Post subject: Preferred Reading List |
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A Preferred Reading List
of Little Known New Age Literature
Irreverently Written and Composed
by Joseph Jochmans
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The Aquarium Gospels of Jacques the Cousteau, by Levi and Strauss
The Opening of the Clown Chakra, by Swami Farbeyondananda
The New and Used Testaments, including the Gossip According to Saint Germane
Canceling Psychic Predictions Due to Unforeseen Circumstances, by Jeanne Mason-Dixon
Biofeedback Prevention...Overcoming Peace of Mind, by the Out-of-Brain / Mind Bull-etin
Karma Krunchies...Reaching into the Bag of Life and Pulling Out the Same Chip, by Miso Frito Ley-Line
There's a Sucker "Born Again" Every Minute, by P. T. Falwell
Out on a Lamb...Prancing in the Blinding Light, by Surly Big Mac Lain
Ramparktha...Story of a 35,000 Year Old Hindu God Who Discovered Hollywood, by Kray Z Fly-by-Knight
Pharoah-Bics...Exercising Your Way to Mummification, by Jane Fonda Farewell
Atlantis and Lemuria...How to Make Fast Money in Real Estate, by Rudolf the Red-Nosed Steiner
The Ten Absolutes to Spiritual Freedom...Finding your God in Someone Else, by Swami Kissmyananda
The Egyptian Book of Dead Jokes, by Pharoah Hohohotep of the 16th Dynasty rerun, translated by E. A. Wallet Bulge
Silver Cord Extensions for Long Distance Astral Travel, by C. W. Bedwetter
Everybody Needs Samadhi Sometime, by Paramahanna Yogananda Parlen-voua?
Master Cute Humi Speaks on the Obssene Gospels, by Elizabeth Cleared Profit
Readings From the Ashkanic Records, The Great Circular Files of the Etheric Planes, by H. P. Bladdervatsky
Nirvana Nervosa...Dieting to Higher Consciousness, by Oedipus Anerexia
Foot Refriedology...Healing Through Fire-Walk Massage, by Dr. Tredsoftly
The Perishables of Christ, by Torkum Serendipity
New Age Video Games, by Avatari, including: Tarot Pac-Man, Donkey-Tai Chi and Battlestar EST
The Midget Psychic Who Escaped from Prison, by a Small Medium at Large
The Maple Leaf Raga, by Scott Ravi Shankar Joplin
Past Life Savings and Loans, by Rajneesh Baksheesh
Training Seeing Third-Eye Dogs for the Psychically Blind, by Alistaire Growley of the Old and Drawn Society
Let Us Hold Hands and Contact the Living, by Sybil Sleek
Black Money-Belt Karate and Acu-Punching, by Mohammed Ali Babaji
I Never Metaphysics I Didn't Like, by Hello Dali Lama
Cosmic Unconsciousness...When The Lights Are On But Nobody's Home, by Dione Misfortune
Here Today, Sodom Gomorrah, by Billy Graham Bell
Uranus Rising to Full Moon...Hindsight Astrology Exposed, by Great Dane Rude-Year
The Book of the Whoopi...Take Two Medicine Wheels and Call Me in the Morning, by Rolling Sun and Bear Thunder
The Pearl of Great Price, Now on Sale at Great Savings, by Bringham Young and his All Wife Band
Silver Dollar Mind Control, by Jose Hi Ho Silva
Death Before Dying...Crossing the River Styx Without a Paddle, by Elizabeth Kublai-Khan-Ross
Beyond Fire Walking...Huna Lava Surfing, by Maximum Freedom Short
New Age Hypno-Therapy...Does the Name Pavlov Ring a Bell?, by Sigmund Jung Supthen
Drop-Ins and Walk-Outs...Seeking an In-the-Body Experience, by Ruth Montgomery Ward and Carol Perished-Hurrah
The Bigfat-Gita...Sacred Hindu Texts of Krishna's Teachings in Brooklyn
Tibetan Break-Jogging and the Shamballa Kabala, by T. Hopalong Rampa
The Excedrin Headache #5 of Oversoul #7, by Jane Oral Roberts
Your Taurus Horroscope...Between the Horns of Dilemma is a Lot of Bull, by Zolar Dollar Sun Signs
You Take My Wife, Pleiades...A Close Encounter of the Not-Too-Sirius King, by Spaced Brother Hilarius of the Ozone Ranger Command
Solar Initiations of the Third Ray on the Sixth Floor of the One Hundred and Twenty-Eighth Street Building, Suite 46A, by Alice Cooper Bailey and the Lucid Trust Me
Bonehenge Decoded and the Deja Vu Over Atlantis...Dowsing for Waylaid-Lines and Hibernating Druids, by John Michellob
HaHa Yoga...Life's a Joke and You're the Punchline, by Swami Pollyannananda
Secrets of the Keystone Coptic Brotherhood, by Hermes Tre-me-get-the-gift-of-this, Master of Rockti Shakti Crystal Power and the Ephemeral Tablets
I Think, Therefore I Ching, the Chinese Book of Small Change, by Tau Jones Industrials
Opening the Third Ear...Listening to People Talk Behind Your Back, by Vera Stanley Livingston Idler
Disintegrated Awareness Techniques...Developing Your Telepathic Powers, by Connie Issac Wayne Fig Newton
The Teachings of Don in the John, by Careless Castenetta
Hare-Back...Initiations of a Young Egyptian in the Left Ear of the Sphinx, by Isha Swallow de Lubejob
Om, Om on the Range...Spectrum Sweet From Inside Mount Everest, by Steve Halpert and the Tibetan Brass
Agony Yoga and the Kundalini Kick...Getting the Cosmic Boot in the Root, by Sr. Bindu Spinefire, certified Cairo-practor and Gyne-Numer-Irid-ologist
Life and Teachings of the Mistresses of the Wild West, by Swami Crayolananda
Meditation While you Sleep...Manifesting Your Realities Into Dreams, by Guru Sigh Baba Gnu
The Grossly Overpriced Oversized Enclyclopedia of Crushedrosian, Hermetically-Sealed, Freemasonjarian, Alcomical and Pithygorean Esoteric Wisdom, by Mainly Pied Hall
A Course in Miracle Whip...Manifesting Salad State Consciousness, by Judith Skutch Tape
Karmic Alimony...The Dangers of Past Wife Regression, by Bounty on the Mutiny
The Recalcitrant Messiah, God Omnipotent, Omniscient and Omnibored, by Richard J. S. Botched
The Spiritual Warrior Gone Berserk...Placing Your Etheric Phasers on Slaughter, by the Beige Brotherhood
Carwash of the Gods...Evidence of Extraterrestrial Tourism, by Karmapa and Erich von Manniken
The Hundredth Retelling of the Hundredth Monkey Story, by Kenneth Keyholes
The Prophet Hobbit...Lord of the Wringed Poetry, by Killed Cliche Gibran Tolkein
Megaton Vitamins and Microbionic Cooking...Fifty Thousand Flies Can't Be Wrong, by Dr. Asa Rol
The Secrets of Flounderhorn...Talks With the Kleenex Devas, by Peter and Eileen Caddyshack
My Night in the Egyptian Hall of Records Without a Record Player, by Dr. Appalled Blunton
Edgar Cantsee...The Sleeping Profit Margin, by Jest Astern
Secret of the Great Pyramid...Built with Tofu Blocks and Tahini Sauce, by Peter Tombkins
Teachings of the Great Off-White Brotherhood, by Annie Oakly Besant
The Not-So-Great Planet Earth...Therapy Ward for the Universe, by Lind Halsey
Hari Kari for the New Age, or How To OD on Enditol, by Swami Mai TymesUp
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© Copyright 1985, by Joseph Jochmans, the Happy Hierophant,
with permission to reprint whenever needed to Lighten Up the Light.
HE WHO LAUGHS, LASTS! |
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Tracer
Joined: 27 Apr 2004 Posts: 159 Location: North Carolina
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Posted: Mon Jun 28, 2004 4:24 pm Post subject: |
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LMAO!!!!! Oh my....I am way behind on my reading...LOL!!!! These are great!!
Nice to see you around woof woof |
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